A vocabulary stren: either…or; both…and

This stren is likely the most powerful to develop a newer way of thinking (ANWOT).  It is the basis of mature thinking and the elimination of prejudice (pre-judgment). 
A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices.   William James                                                                   

The instructions are clear.  The application is easy.  The results are profound.  Simply attempt to substitute “both…and” for “either…or” each and every time it makes sense to do so.

            Throughout our early years, when we are physically immature and mentally undeveloped, we learn to think in terms of “either…or.”  We divide the world into me or not me, us or them, friend or foe, right or wrong, good or bad, O.K. or not O.K., yes or no (we mostly say “yes,” our parents say “no!”), can or can’t, for me or against me, safe or dangerous, and so on.  Processing information into two categories is called “dichotomous thinking.”  After thousands of repetitions, dichotomous thinking becomes wired into our native language and becomes the effortless habitual manner we process information to action.  It is self-evident that this early manner of categorizing data into two categories distorts our perception of the world.  Labels like bad, wrong, ugly, turn-on prejudice, intolerance, hatred, and related blaming behaviors.  Do you see how our early manner of thinking is a common source of conflict?  We regularly observe instances of dichotomous thinking persisting in adults, law¹, aesthetics, religion, and communication between nations.  Limiting our alternatives to two categories restricts our creative thinking just as I would be limited in writing this stren if my computer was equipped with a spreadsheet software program and had no word processing program or a very primitive one. 
           
            We may produce a cup of coffee by heating four distinct ingredients: ground coffee beans, water, milk, and sugar.  The product is no longer the distinct ingredients but a mixture of a + b + c + d.  The interaction of our genes, nurturers, and self; of instinct, habit, and will, and their means of expression, i.e. their “operating systems” (O.S.s), is likewise a mixture with characteristics distinctive from the original ingredients.  With the cup of coffee, we may start with only water and coffee, and choose to add a fraction of milk or make the drink mostly milk; we can add a little sugar, a cup of sugar, or no sugar.  The combinations are infinite.  Similarly, can you imagine that biologic creatures first function according to the rules of nature?  To nature’s rules, nurturers may add a little or quite a bit. And to the mixture of nature and nurture, we may add a little or quite a lot of our self.  In each situation, there is a continuum of variation.  The product of mixing the rules of our genes, our nurturers, and our self also has infinite combinations.  We are prone to distort reality when we think in terms of either “a” or “b” or “c”.  We are usually more accurate when we think in terms of “both…and,” “a” and “b” and “c”.  While the majority of earth’s creatures are mostly nature-driven, humans receive a huge dose of programming from nurturers, and in our later stage of development we add self-direction.  

            Such often-asked questions as, “What’s more important, nature or nurture?” and “Which came first, the chicken or the egg?” distorts our understanding.  This is an appropriate question from an immature mind that yet thinks in “either…or” terms.  We can picture change occurring in a continuous spiral, first something like the chicken, then something like the egg, progressing to what we now recognize as the chicken and the egg.   We recognize that the early instances of phenomena are usually primitive and gradually evolve to become what we recognize now in its advanced stage.  “Simple” usually increases in complexity and/or efficiency over time.  Knowledge, reason, and wisdom are acquired only after considerable physical and mental maturity.  Updating our thinking by emphasizing both… and allows us to get beyond our primitive either…or first manner of processing information.

            We have no difficulty choosing between a garbage sandwich and a sandwich containing a favorite food.  In actuality, the complex world we live in seldom presents such simple choices.  We view the menu of a restaurant; choice-making requires weighing the positives and negatives of each alternative.  We can be happy with most of the alternatives.  The choice of spending or saving our money has pluses and minuses on each side.  Wisdom may suggest we do both, save some and spend some.  Similarly, most issues, such as ethics and aesthetics, are not right or wrong.  They also usually present us with a combination of positives and negatives.  Is a concerned mother who steals milk so her child can survive a sinner or a saint?  Neither?  Right or wrong?  Good or bad?  Are our enemies “all” wrong, evil, while we are “all” right and just in our cause?  Does our manner of thinking allow us to recognize that the “other” often has similar needs, wants, and passion for love, justice, and peace as we do?  We may wisely ask how much does our manner of thinking contribute to our making the other our enemy?  To what degree would we be wise to emphasize making our choices right more so than making the right choice?  

            Dichotomous thinking is black or white.  ANWOT thinking is in Technicolor! 
Here is an example: There is so much bad in the best of us,
                                    And so much good in the worst of us,
                                    That it ill behooves any of us,
                                    To put down the rest of us.
We act wisely when we update our thinking with Technicolor!
 
            To the degree we limit our thinking to either…or, we predictably distort our commonly-shared reality to suit our personal bias.  There are wiser more accurate alternatives.   Nevertheless, our innate dichotomous thinking, reinforced by repetition, remains the preferred path information is processed.   Considerable practice is required to substitute the more productive manner of thinking.      

            We can understand and forgive our nurturers.  They teach us to think in either…or terms when we are mentally immature and physically undeveloped, when we are unable to determine when to cross the street, touch the stove, and to not wipe our nose on the curtain.  Most mean well and do their reasonable best with what their pupils can manage.  When we attain maturity, we often remain imperceptibly stuck in our early manner of thinking.  The newer manner of thinking is attained by those fortunate to have wise role models, and/or who just “get it” through common sense and experience.  For most, dichotomous thinking and/or its remnants are a major source of prejudice, intolerance, hatred, and destructive acts of aggression. 

            The problem remains huge because our culture has yet to provide the simple educational resources that teach us how to upgrade our manner of thinking.  Do you realize that in every reasonable size city, one can open a phone book and/or turn on the TV and find instruction in physical exercise, computers, real estate, poker, playing a musical instrument and very esoteric subjects?  Yet where does one turn to learn the most basic skills of constructive thinking?   As need is recognized, solutions usually follow.  I envision that we will spawn various forms of education in ANWOT in the near future. 

            The cure for dichotomous thinking is readily acquired by anyone willing to engage in a simple mental exercise.  It requires substituting an analog² word or trigger-switch³ such as both…and for the prevalent dichotomous either…or words.  This easy step, regularly practiced, will promote our well-being.  Practiced by many, it will also improve our community’s well-being.              

            Both…and and either…or are trigger-switches.  They each trigger the pathway through which thinking leads to action.  Both…and channels thinking to follow the preferred updated pathway of self-mastery.  Either…or directs energy along the wiring pre-established by our genes and nurturers.  Keep in mind that the prejudices, the “pre-judgments” of nature are designed to emphasize the immediate short-term solution, to satisfy “me” often at the expense of “not me.”  Nature’s perspective is amoral.  Our nurturers’ prejudices, their pre-judgments, are likewise dictatorial.  The dichotomous perspective our nurturers inscribe in us through our immature years may convey immense wisdom, absolute compliance, and/or anything in between, depending on how fate has selected their nurturers.  Though predictably well-meaning, we can be certain their best efforts apply to the circumstances of their own nurturing and require updating, especially with the rapidly accelerating changes we now initiate through science.  When we jump immediately to the either…or manner of processing information before considering both…and, before using our reflective thinking skills, we yet submit our creativity to the whims of fate and circumstance.  Blind obedience is unacceptable to a freed mind.      

            Earth’s creatures have passively evolved adhering to the rules provided by instinct and habit.  Nature provides us a magnificent brain.  Our nurturers equip it with sophisticated language.  In the course of attaining maturity, we combine these two marvelous resources to become proficient in reflective thinking, the ability to think about our thinking, to be conscious of our consciousness.  While reflective thinking is nature and our nurturers’ gift of opportunity, the mental freedom to direct our will power requires our own doing.  We bear the responsibility to emancipate our will from what fate and circumstance have made of us.  We also make the choice of what degree of wisdom to add, even to determine what is “wise.”

            As our use of language, originality, and creativity has grown, and with it our growth of power and collection of wisdom, we can recognize the benefit of updating the means we process information, of adding ANWOT.  We are rapidly increasing our freedom to modify the programs of nature and nurture, and to initiate new programs within our mental operating system.  Skillful reflective thinking enables our self to join the persuasive power of nature and nurture to direct our life’s experience.

            As our self emerges it may add reason and wisdom to instinct and habit.  The wise use of reason requires newer means of processing information to action, ANWOT.  If we choose to develop ANWOT, we are required to challenge our established patterns.  Nature, through genes, first programs our thinking.  Our nurturers challenge and significantly modify the patterns of instinct we inherit.  The challenge to our self is to add reason, self-initiation, originality, creativity, and constructive leadership to our resource for reflective thinking.  Let’s update the means for processing information-to-action acquired from our first masters and make them appropriate for modernity.   

            Now to avoid confusion, let us clarify that either…or may indeed be very appropriate after we wisely consider the both…and, pluses and minuses, positives and negatives of each of our alternatives.   By doing so, we are far more likely to problem-solve with a better understanding of reality, make wiser choices, and assume short and long-term responsibility for our choice-making.

            Self-management is a powerful tool for constructive and destructive action.  It surely will be disastrous in a mind stuck in dichotomous thinking.  The importance of taking action to educate ourselves in the skill of wise thinking is self-evident.  You will take an important simple step by substituting both … and thinking for either … or thinking whenever it is reasonable.

SUMMARY:  Our first manner of thinking divides the world into two categories.  Generally whatever is me is good, right, and praiseworthy.  Whatever is not me should be for my benefit or it is bad, wrong, and deserving of harm.  Genes prepare us to instinctively fight or run to preserve our self.  Our nurturers instill in our mind what is good, right, needed to win and dominate; and with it, we recognize their opposites … what is bad, wrong, the losers who are unworthy.  Our current establishment is deficient in educating its citizens how to update our thinking for modernity.  Until ANWOT is routinely taught, we can expect continuation of harmful prejudice, hatred, intolerance, and waste of our valuable energy on destructive aggression.  As we recognize our manner of thinking is the main source of our problems, we will initiate the rapid growth of learning opportunities in the newer way of thinking, in ANWOT.   

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